Y 6.16.2006
Another Senior Week
Another week of my senior life has passed. Another gruesome, tiresome, GC week. I have started to accpet the fact that I am now part of the section IV-Copernicus but my heart is still with III-Mendel. I guess it's still too early to get bonded with Coper but then again, we already had fun moments, like our Filipino class yesterday wherein we showcased our talents. I have made new friends, acquaintances and no enemies, I'm glad. I guess I haven't bonded with everybody yet. I'm already comfortable with talking to Karen, Katrina, Annjanette, Marvie, Kathleen, Cesca, Nicole, Blessie, Jennifer, Arvin, Mark, Kyle, Kevin, Karl, and Benjie who are all new faces. But even if we're already starting to get to know each other, there's still a huge gap. One cannot stop himself/herself from being a bit afraid of the BIG 5 or those people on top. At first, I share their feelings. Kyle is actually my seatmate in Math and Chem. and when I can't understand something I was scared to ask him because he might think I'm such an idiot for asking such a simple question or he might not even answer. But after some time, you would realize that they are just like us. It's just that they're a bit different from the people we used to be with. I guess at first I was kind of overwhelmed, actually I still am, because this is the first time I experienced the boys being more academically inclined than the girls in a class. This is also the firt time I've experienced tension because everyone seems to be trying to prove that they have something. I've noticed some changes with the people I used to know. Sam, who I can say was not that active in Mendel when it comes to groupings or other school-related work is now giving all she's got. Jude, who was only one of the boys now seems to be focusing himself in his studies. I am glad with the changes. I think that's one of the good things of being in Coper. I can say that it might seem like a survival of the fittest wherein if you don't join the flow, you will die, same with Coper. If you don't start being "GC", you will feel like "napagiwanan ka na". There have already been many surprises and I'm sure there are still more to come. I'm ready to face the challenge. I will make sure that this year will be my best. There will be no more distractions. I wouldn't say, no more going out because that's already a part of me and I can't remove that habit of going out. It would just be a world with my studies, my friends from Mendel, and my best friends in the whole world. I wouldn't give any attention to love life or crushes or whatever. I am determined to excell this year. My goal is not to outshine other people but my goal is to shine with a different light. Next week is another week. It'll be another week of being GC. I won't complain because this is life. But, you know what, sometimes I feel like I'm so alone even if I'm surrounded by a multitude of people. I feel like there's an emptiness inside me. Even if I'm with my friends, when I stop for a moment and think, there seems to be something missing. I can't point out what and that's what bothers me. I do hope that whatever is missing. I would soon be able to find it. As I face the new responsibilities, challenges and endeavors that God will give me, I will face them with courage and with a ready heart knowing that in the end, I will succeed. ~ P.S. I would just like to post a picture of Mendel when we went out last week...^_^
you know you love me
xoxo
7:12:00 PM
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